Thursday, May 22, 2014

The Origin of the Term A**hat

I am lucky enough to have met two of my closest friends, Alexis and Anthony, fourteen years ago, almost right after I moved back to the United States.

We were really cool
But it's okay, we turned out alright:
But, before we got all growed up and pretty, we were a mess. Okay fine. We are still a mess, we just got better at dressing up.
One story in particular sums up our relationship.
It was an afternoon during winter break and we were bored. Alexis needed to have her cell phone looked at, so the three of us went to the Verizon store. We were wandering around looking at fancy phones we couldn't afford when it happened. Anthony and I were messing around with a display case and we knocked the whole darn thing over. We're talking crashing, breaking, shrieking, knocked over. We looked at each other, and without a word ran out of the Verizon store, leaving Alexis to deal with the fall-out (hah, see what I did there?) of our mess.
Once we were outside, this is the conversation that should have happened:
"Oh man, that was really dumb, we should go back inside and deal with the mess we made instead of leaving it with her to clean up."
This is the conversation that happened:
"Well, that was a mess. Oh! Look! Party City! We should go in."
So, Anthony and I ran into Party City without a second thought. And then instead of feeling bad or worrying about our friend we had just heartlessly abandoned, we did this:
The signs of true friendship: a friend who is always willing to clean up after you and forgives you for running away from responsibility and/or a friend who takes pictures with you in hats at inappropriate times.  

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